If only Alice had trekking poles in Wonderland

I tell you ratbaggers you don't know how ill and incapacitated you've been until you begin to recover. Trust me, I know. And as I get older I see that I have to work much harder to stay on top of my ill health. >>

So if you perchance are planning on adopting the chronic illness lifestyle remember these words. It's hard work! Flamin' hard work.

Perhaps you've seen that perennial segment on A Current Affair or the other TV infotainment daily where the woman loses weight by walking around and around her clothes line. The whole thing is absurd when you think about it. Why a clothes line? Why a circle?

But my grand physical scheme is to walk around a four metre wide swimming pool every day of the year . I walk because I cannot swim and still turn left . I walk anti-clockwise around and around such that I deserve my own segment on A Current Affair or the other infotainment daily. I've even got a wet suit for those cold days...like in July!
Why I don't walk clockwise is a conundrum. Is it something to do with the hemispheric physics which may determine the direction water goes down a plug hole? What would happen in my life if I decided to change direction as matter of course and pushed all that H2O hither rather than yon?
If I don't do this and take my dog for walks with my much loved trekking poles I am cactus. The aquatic exercise is related to the terrestrial perambulations as my body movements are very similar in each case: reach/pull/reach/pull/reach/pull ...tell me about it!

It's like walking on all fours while upright . Both regimes are akin to the rhythm of cross country skiing (not that I've ever done that) --except you don't get to coast down hills. Nonetheless after a few circuits around a 4 metre wide plastic plunge pool (we call it the dixie cup) you generate a whirlpool that bears you along. I keep thinking that with this energy debate upon us, maybe I can harness this aqua rotation for clean electricity purposes. Just plug me into the grid.

If I don't do these things --and this is the bitter lesson -- and fail to follow this regimen for some reason then my health deteriorates big time. After being ill and disabled like this for over 20 years I have to keep reminding myself of this core fact:you must run so hard to stay still.
Of course it is,' said the Queen, `what would you have it?'
`Well, in our country,' said Alice, still panting a little, `you'd generally get to somewhere else -- if you ran very fast for a long time, as we've been doing.'
`A slow sort of country!' said the Queen. `Now, here, you see, it takes all the running you can do, to keep in the same place.If you want to get somewhere else, you must run at least twice as fast as that!'